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. Last Updated: 07/27/2016

Pet Cemetery for Sale, Only $1M




SAN FRANCISCO -- There is a grim little corner of the Internet you can have for just $1 million.


Virtual Pet Cemetery, a web site billed as "the world's best known and most cherished online burial ground" for dogs, cats and other pets, is for sale on the eBay Internet auction site, with opening bids set at $1 million.


That buys the right to the web pages at www.mycemetery.com/my/


pet.html, which feature pictures of dead pets and epitaphs written by grieving owners. Virtual Pet Cemetery's founder, Steve Hoffman, said the $1 million price tag is justified because the site earns about $150 a month from pet obituary listings.


"Look at how much Amazon.com is losing," Hoffman told last week's San Francisco Chronicle, pointing to the online retail pioneer that saw its market valuation top $30 billion despite being millions of dollars in the red.


"Look at their valuation. Now look at us. How can we not be worth a million dollars?" he asked.


It is a business proposition that so far has not proved too appealing for eBay's bidders, however. Since it was listed on the auction site early last week, it has not attracted a single offer.


Still, Hoffman and his wife, Naomi, who co-founded the site for their company, LavaMind, said there was still hope that one of the big online pet sites like Pets.com would see the merits of establishing a foothold in the animal afterlife.


In the meantime, the site has become too cumbersome for LavaMind to run, Hoffman said, telling the Chronicle that "the workload has overtaken the love."


All of which makes the future a little murky for the animal memorials and pet testimonies that crowd the virtual cemetery's 26 "plots" - ranging from simple declarations of love to pet panegyrics like the one penned by Mickey Huffstetter:


"Here lies Blackie, Chased a car,


Caught in the muffler,


Dragged through the tar,


Around the corner,


Across the track,


He might not be dead,


But he never came back...."